A Carleton County Turnkey
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  • 2008
    • August
      • Only the beginning of Mrs. Mason’s troubles
        08/24/08
        August 24, 1863: It would seem passing notes hasn’t been the only troubles Mrs. Mason has had with “her girls” – who are, apparently, a rowdy bunch of young women:

        Not only were they using the yarn given to them for mending to send notes to the cellblock below, but they’ve been making soc

    • July
      • Gotta give ‘em credit
        07/27/08
        July 27, 1863: With everyone re-organized, we’ve got Mrs. Mason and the women (including our many prostitutes from a week or two ago) up on the right side of cellblock 6 – each of the other cellblocks has been reserved for a different class of male prisoner.

        Imagine my surprise, then, whe

      • A new (and supposedly improved) organization
        07/13/08
        July 13, 1863: So we’ve had to do a little musical chairs with our inmates of late. Everyone’s been shifted and re-classified since the Board of Inspectors were here last week. A real effort is being taken to keep the accused and convicted separate from one another, the repeat from the first time of

      • Hello, good-lookin’
        07/13/08
        July 13, 1863: Well, I’m sure you’ll be happy to know that I am, according to the half-dozen or so brothel-workers who just got brought in to serve 20 days each, a “fine specimen of a man.”

        Alice is just thrilled, I can assure you.

      • The plot (a.k.a. the soup) thickens
        07/06/08
        July 6, 1863: Turns out I’m not the only one who keeps hearing about the blasted pea soup. George has had a whole slew of complaints about it as well (and has also resorted to tasting it for himself, only to discover he quite liked it as well – poor bloke – had to be damn good to him – he hasn’t a w

    • June
      • Again with the pea soup!
        06/28/08
        June 28, 1863: Had another complaint about the pea soup today. Something like: “I wouldn’t even serve it to my dog” followed by what can only be described as a hissy fit. Gave him two days in the dark cell to let him know grown men aren’t supposed to throw temper tantrums – especially when they’re i

    • April
      • Growing hopes
        04/18/08
        April 18, 1863: It’s starting to show a little that Alice is pregnant – I’m just amazed that a tiny human being is growing inside her belly. I don’t care if it’s not manly to say so, but I’m really excited about this baby.

        And thankful. The hopes I have for Alice and my new family are wha

    • March
      • A grisly affair
        03/27/08
        March 27, 1863: So you know that guy I brought up to the hospital, because he’d stepped on a nail? Turns out that incompetent doctor left it so long, that the wound festered, became gangrenous, and the whole foot had to be amputated!

        Mrs. Mason said she could hear the guy screaming in pai

      • I’m not trained for this sort of thing…
        03/25/08
        March 25, 1863: One of my worst nightmares was realized three days ago. Couldn’t write about it ‘til now, I was in such a state of shock and disgust.

        Had a lunatic in here – and I mean a verifiable insane person awaiting transfer to an asylum – that just went berserk in his cell after loc

      • Beware the Ides of March
        03/17/08
        March 17, 1863: Been a hellish week. Mrs. Mason says it had something to do with the Ides of March. I don’t know about that, but what I do know is that every single dark cell has been occupied for the last 4 or 5 days, and we’ve got at least a half dozen or so prisoners restricted to their cells.
      • The pea soup debate continues
        03/10/08
        March 10, 1863: Got a comment about the pea soup again yesterday – something about it being “unfit for human consumption”. I was just shocked that any of our inmates could use a word that long.

        Turns out he was some suit who’d been caught in a bawdy house. Was feeling real superior to eve

      • Suspicions and conspiracy theories
        03/03/08
        March 3, 1863: George says he thinks the surgeon was drunk the last time he went up to see him too. Apparently was slurring his words and everything. And according to Mrs. Mason – who’s up there more often than either of us dealing with the women – she’s never seen him sober. Was clucking like a mot

    • February
      • A minor wound
        02/25/08
        February 25, 1863: Had to bring an inmate who’d stepped on a nail up to the gaol surgeon today. Could have sworn he was drunk.

        Didn’t seem to care much about the prisoner, either.

        (I tell you, this guy is really not impressing me)

      • Damn near a blizzard in here
        02/19/08
        February 19, 1863: Can’t wait for Spring. Had a huge snowfall last night that just covered the cellblocks in huge drifts of snow. I swear it was thigh-high in some areas, and was pouring into the cells. Had a real hard time just doing my rounds and opening up the cells for the day.

        Was r

      • Food fight!
        02/12/08
        February 12, 1863: I thing everyone’s finally relaxed – at least the inmates are. There was a food fight in cellblock four today…we let them keep at it until they had nothing left to throw. The joke, of course, is on them since they haven’t anything to clean themselves up with (and we decided to be

      • On edge
        02/04/08
        February 4, 1863: Tensions have been running high since last week. Everyone’s a little on edge – especially Alice. She’s terrified that I’m going to be the target of some sort of “payback”.

    • January
      • A serious incident
        01/28/08
        January 28, 1863: We had a pretty serious incident at the gaol yesterday…feel bad for George – he’s pretty rattled. We were making our rounds as usual in the morning, and getting the prisoners started shovelling the snow out of the corridors. Turns out the villains in the right side of cellblock 6 d

      • Screaming and hollering
        01/21/08
        January 21, 1863: Caught one of the female prisoners trying to talk to the men when they were out clearing snow in the courtyard – she was actually yelling out the window (as if we wouldn’t notice?).

        I suggested the dark cell – Mrs. Mason (always with an opinion of her own) didn’t like t

      • Cell 1
        01/14/08
        January 14, 1863: Found a cell door lock that’s sticking on my rounds last night – got to remember to let the governor know.

        George and I had a good laugh over the irony of it: it’s the first in a series of death row cells – imagine someone was in there, and we couldn’t get him out to ex

      • Good riddance to Christmas cheer
        01/07/08
        January 7, 1863: Thankful the holidays are, for the most part, over. Had far too many drunks spending the night.

        I know it’s best to get them off the streets, but the whole process seems a little flawed: we pack ‘em three to a cell – even if there are individual drum cells available – and

  • 2007
    • December
      • Christmas charity
        12/31/07
        December 31, 1862: Been celebrating the spirit of the season at the gaol by taking in vagrants and giving them a place to stay, and regular meals, over the holidays. It’s hard to believe how many poor there are in Ottawa…can’t help thinking back to when Father died, and I could’ve ended up one of th

      • Happy tidings
        12/24/07
        December 24, 1862: Already got my Christmas present this year: Alice is pregnant.

      • The beginning of the great pea soup debate
        12/17/07
        December 17, 1862: Broke up a fight today between two prisoners. They refused to tell me what it was over, and then mounted a unified front swearing and cursing at me, complaining about last night’s supper (something about the pea soup).

        Sent them both to the dark cell for a week, on a r

      • Let it snow!
        12/10/07
        December 10, 1862: Had our first snowfall last night – I don’t think it’ll last on the ground, but it gave us a clear idea of what to expect this winter:

        The wind blew the snow directly through the cellblock windows where there’s no glass – only bars and shutters that proved no defence ag

      • A dirty affair…
        12/03/07
        December 3, 1862: Gets dirty in the cellblocks real fast. Gotta be because we have so many people coming and going. To make matters worse for those that are sticking around, we still haven’t really got any means of regular washing set up for them – no bath, basins or tubs. Nothing.

        So, fo

    • November
      • And so the punishments begin
        11/25/07
        November 25, 1862: Had to administer my first official punishment today. Not for anything too serious – just an inmate with excessively bad language. Warned him a few times, but after he kept up in front of the chaplain, I had to make it a formal reprimand. Wrote him up, and gave him three days in t

      • No happy campers here…
        11/21/07
        November 21, 1862: It would seem the prisoners are a little disappointed with their new accommodations. Can’t say I blame them. They’ve gone from large communal cells in the old gaol where they could chat with one another and receive visitors at the windows (and any food, clothes, or other items tha

      • The big day
        11/19/07
        November 19, 1862: Well, they’re here – seems a little anti-climactic, to be honest.

      • So much to do, so little time…
        11/15/07
        November 15, 1862: It’s official: we’re moving the prisoners in next week. Me and George – the other turnkey – haven’t stopped making preparations, ensuring everything is in working order, and trying to clarify procedure for any situation we can think of. Can’t say the same about our night watchmen…

      • Well, well, well…
        11/12/07
        November 12, 1862: Got my uniforms. Alice was right: I do look handsome!

      • It’s moving day!
        11/10/07
        November 10, 1862: Alice and I are moving into the front mansion of the gaol today. I think she’s of two minds on the subject: she’s delighted we’ll never have to worry about where we’re going to live again, but somewhat alarmed at the prospect of living in the same building as criminals and the ins

      • A malodorous realization
        11/07/07
        November 7, 1862: Alice says I’m letting my imagination get the best of me, and that I should just deal with things as they come. It’s good advice. Besides – I’ve realized that my greatest fear isn’t anything the prisoners will say or do – rather it’ll be how they smell.

        Dreamt of my one

      • Cramped quarters
        11/06/07
        November 6, 1862: Had my first full tour of the new gaol today…feels even larger once you’re inside. Sure am relieved I’ll be working in there and not locked up – those cells are small. Real small. Small enough to make you uncomfortable. Very uncomfortable. Mad, even…Though the rulebook they gave me

      • The awful majesty of the law
        11/02/07
        November 2, 1862: I can’t get over the size of it…it’s just massive. And to be honest, a little intimidating…can’t believe I’m supposed to be working there in the next few weeks…it doesn’t quite feel real yet.

        But it will. Got measured by a tailor for the first time in my life for my new

    • July
      • My new job...
        07/19/07
        July 19, 1862: So I took the turnkey job. I’ve already been given a rulebook to study (though I was surprised nobody actually thought to check if I could read it), will get a set of brand new uniforms, and I’ll have a place to live (with my family) in the front governor’s mansion. I’ll have almost f